Vipassana

Oops, I did it again!

“Awareness of desperation… Become aware of your desperation.”

Ok, he says respiration, but desperation keeps replaying in my mind. I’m back at Vipassana, reminding myself not to get sucked into craving and aversion, and to just hit pause on life for ten days, in probably the most intense way possible. But I chose it, and here I am. I know what I’m in for. Let’s see if there’s been any progress on this path to liberation!

My day-to-day life is good. It’s busy though and unsettled in some vague way. I can’t complain, but in the past three and a half years, I haven’t really stopped moving.

I’ve just arrived at the Vipassana centre on the Sunny Coast after a quick five-day drive down from Far North Queensland. As I drive in, eastern grey kangaroos, joeys in pouches, stare at me while munching on grass, and kookaburras are laughing their heads off, like they know I’m a sucker for coming back to sit again. I laugh too, might as well get it out now since I won’t be allowed to laugh out loud for the next ten days once I enter noble silence.

Vipassana is kind of like becoming a monk or nun for ten days: we live on charity, meditate for a fuck ton of hours each day, vow not to steal, kill, or do bad things and we can’t speak ill of anyone (which is easy enough because we can’t speak at all!) We…